You'd probably think that because I am a massage therapist, I would say the best way to reduce and manage stress is with a massage, right? Actually, you'd be wrong. 
  While massage is an awesome tool to help manage stress, I don't think it's the *best* tool for it. 
  So what is? I'll give you the short answer here before taking a deep dive into why. 
  The best tool to manage stress is..... exercise!

   To understand why exercise can be so beneficial, first we need to truly understand what the stress response is and how it affects every system of our body. This post is a long one, but I promise it is worth the read. You will come away from it with a much better understanding of your physical and mental health and how to improve it effectively.  
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  All of us experience stress. It’s safe to say that average stress levels are at an all-time high. How could they not be? Between a constant cycle of news articles, social media, aggressive marketing, along with normal daily stressors of life, our stress levels have become dangerously unmanageable. 
  Stress can cause or exacerbate almost every ailment you can think of. Anxiety, depression, disordered eating, acne, high-blood pressure, reproductive issues, you name it and stress has a negative effect on it. 
  But it’s important to remember that “stress” is a normal physiological response and at times is very necessary for our survival. For this reason, we need to stop looking at stress as being “bad” and instead learn to understand it. 

What is the Stress Response?

  Let's begin by learning about our autonomic nervous system. The autonomic nervous system controls things that happen automatically and don’t require conscious thought. This includes functions like breathing, digestion, etc. Our natural stress response involves two different parts of the autonomic nervous system. One is called the sympathetic nervous system, and the other is called the parasympathetic. To start, we are going to focus on the SNS, the sympathetic nervous system. 

  Imagine yourself in this situation: You are driving your car. You stop at a red light. The light turns green, and you begin to go. But just as you enter the intersection, some guy who was trying to beat a yellow light races right in front of you. As soon as you see them coming you begin to react. You hit your brakes, maybe even swerve out of the way. Maybe you lay on your horn to give them a piece of your mind - they could have killed you, after all!
  Now assess how your body would feel after an incident like this. Your heart is likely racing, your extremities might be shaking a bit, and there’s a rush going through you. 
  This is the SNS at work. The “stress response”. It is also called our “fight or flight” response. Our brain senses danger and immediately instructs various systems of the body to have different reactions just in case we need to fight or flee from the danger. Hence the nickname “fight or flight”. 
  Our heart begins to beat faster and our breathing quickens, so that more blood and oxygen can be delivered to the arms and legs, in case you need to run for your life or fight whatever danger you are facing. Meanwhile, blood is diverted from organs that aren’t needed at that moment- organs such as the stomach, liver, or intestines. We don’t really need to be concerned with digesting food while fighting for our lives. The pupils of our eyes dilate, letting in more light so we can see more effectively. Our muscles tense, ready for action. All of these reactions are basic survival instincts. We sense danger, and we react to be able to face it.

  Now, let’s get a little deeper into precisely what causes these reactions. It begins with that outside stimulus, but what exactly does our brain do to cause all these physical changes?
  When we experience a stressful situation, the hypothalamus is activated. This area of the brain controls many of our automatic functions, such as breathing or our blood pressure and heart rate. Sensing you may be in danger, the hypothalamus instructs your adrenal glands on top of your kidneys to start producing epinephrine. 
  Epinephrine is a key stress hormone and the first one to circulate throughout the body after a stress-inducting event. It’s the rush we feel when we get scared. This hormone provides that initial physiological response, such as our breathing increasing, raised blood pressure, and divergence of blood to the muscles. 
 Although this may seem like a lot of steps, it happens so quickly that we can respond to a stimulus in a nanosecond. That’s why, in the scenario earlier, we were immediately able to tense our body, swerve out of the way, and hit the brakes. All in the blink of an eye. We didn’t even really have to think, we just had to react.
  The epinephrine response is very quick. It comes on quickly and fades quickly.  Therefore, there is a secondary response to stress in case we need to stay on high alert for longer than a few seconds. This secondary response involves the adrenals and the pituitary gland. Once that initial epinephrine surge happens, our body begins producing cortisol. This is a very important hormone to remember, as it is the main cause of our daily high stress levels. (More on that in our next section.) Cortisol does mostly the same thing as epinephrine, but lasts longer and helps to keep our bodies in a state of awareness and survival-mode for a longer amount of time than epinephrine. This may be due to an ongoing stress factor. For example, if we are being attacked and need to fight, we need much more than an initial rush of epinephrine, we need to stay in survival mode for a long time.

  As we physically fight or flee from the source of our stress, that activity burns these hormones. And once the stress hormones are used, they begin to fade, and their response ceases to affect us. 

  Remember I said there are two aspects to this, the sympathetic and the parasympathetic. The parasympathetic is the exact opposite of the stress response. It is activated when the stress or threat passes, and once those stress hormones are burned up. It is known as our “rest and digest” system. This happens in a similar way to the SNS response, but with different hormones.  
  When “rest and digest” is active, our body releases “feel-good” hormones such as oxytocin, and our heart rate slows, our blood pressure lowers, blood and oxygen are returned to digestive organs so we can continue to break down food and nutrients. During this time is when our body repairs itself, grows, changes, nurtures itself. It can take the time to do this because it is at peace and doesn’t have to worry about fighting anything.

  The SNS and the PNS are usually not active at the same time. It is one or the other. 

Why Are Our Stress Levels So High?

  So now you understand what stress is from a biological point of view, but it still doesn’t answer the question of why our stress levels are so dangerously high. If stress is a normal physiological response why is it malfunctioning? Why are we stressed all the time?
  To answer this we need to go way way back in time, to when humanity was young. Basically when we dwelled in caves, and were learning how to make fire. We were hunter/gatherers. Survival looked different back then. 
  What would initiate a stress response back then? Probably things like hunting, defending yourself from a wild animal attack, or an attack from a rival tribe. All things that require physical strength to defeat. 
  If we were in danger, our body prepared us for a fight, we used that hormone response to either fight or flee from the attacker, the stress hormones were used up, we relaxed, our bodies healed. 
  Simple. As it evolved to be. 

  Consider what causes stress in our lives every day. And, no I don’t mean the freak incidents like the oncoming car, I mean the stress you experience daily. 
  Workplace responsibilities, an overbearing boss, your kids arguing, your ailing mother needing care, the car needing $1000 in repairs, gas costing $5 a gallon, unrelenting news articles about war and death, influencers making you feel inadequate... should I go on? We could add a dozen more things to that list- and those are just the stressors we face in a single day or week! Now throw in situations that may not be daily but are part of life. A sobering medical diagnosis, or job loss, or divorce. All of these things cause a stress response. They are scary, they are threats to us and our safety, at least that’s how our bodies and brain perceive them to be. 
  Now think about this- how many of those situations we just mentioned can you physically fight? How many can you physically flee from? Absolutely none of them. 
  Therefore, not only are we bombarded with dozens of stressful situations in a day, but none of them are things we can properly use our stress response to overcome! 
  Stress hormones are being pumped into our bodies every day with no way of burning them up or stopping production. When one stress-inducing trigger stops, another is already there to take its place. And because we are never burning up those hormones with physical activity, they keep piling on and on. 
  This means our heart rate and blood pressure are constantly high, leading to heart disease. Our digestive system is always slow, leading to IBS, obesity. Our body can’t build, repair or break down nutrients as we need them, leading to acne, ulcers, and infection. Our minds are constantly alert, constantly in survival mode, which can lead to anxiety and depression, and greatly exacerbate existing mental health issues such as bipolar disorder, or eating disorders. 
  By now it should be coming together for you- a messy, chaotic puzzle. Something triggers the stress response, body-altering hormones get produced, because of our numerous daily stressors and lack of ability to use up the hormones that are already pumping through our system more hormones get produced and piled on, our bodies are not functioning at a normal, healthy level, which leads to disease and illness. 


How Do We Turn Off the Stress Response?

  Most of the stressors we face daily we cannot avoid. Or at least, we can’t avoid them without a dramatic change. I guess in theory we could quit a terrible job, or cut a toxic person out of our lives, or even swear off social media. But in reality, these things are difficult to do. How do we manage stress properly and still live our lives?
  I think this can be done a few ways, and the answers are in the physiological response, which is why I devoted all this time to breaking it down for you. 
  Let’s take a look at how those hormones are supposed to be used. They are produced to help us with the physical activity that comes with fighting or fleeing from danger. For example, that’s why blood is sent to the major muscle groups, to help us run. We already talked about how we can’t fight or flee from modern stressors. But we can take time to engage in physical activity that will still help burn off those hormones. 
  Our modern world requires us to live sedentary lifestyles. Many of us have office jobs where we sit at a desk and computer all day. And when we come home, we are so mentally drained (aka stressed) that we just crash. Which absolutely does not help burn off those stress hormones. 
  I recommend introducing some type of good, enjoyable, physical exercise into your life. The enjoyable part is key- if it’s something you hate then you’re just adding on a new stressor. Have fun finding whatever this new activity may be, use it as an excuse to try new things. Try a class like yoga, pilates, or dance. Something that will make you sweat a little, but will make you feel good. Get outside and go for a run, or if running is not your thing even a nice walk through the neighborhood will be extremely beneficial. Go for a swim, which is one of the best forms of exercise in my opinion. Don’t have a pool? Local YMCAs often have open swim or swim classes, many state parks have beaches open to the public. Or grab your partner and go play tennis. 

  Move. Sweat. Fatigue your muscles. This is what will use those stress hormones, burn them, and allow your body to come back down to a relaxed state. Then go home, make yourself a good meal, and then sit down and let “rest and digest” take over.
 
  I have one more piece of advice that I want to throw in here because it is something over the years I’ve had many people mention to me that I realize they have backwards. Often, before we do something strenuous we will eat a big meal first. One reason is because maybe it’s the end of the day and we are starving when we get home so we want to eat before exercise. But it's also because there is this misconception that if we eat before exercise then the exercise will burn off that meal. This isn't really the case. When we exercise we are actually burning nutrients that have already been broken down from previous meals. We don’t use the food that is sitting in our stomachs, that food still needs to be digested. When we eat, it should be followed by rest… remember it’s “rest and digest”! Let your body go into its more relaxed state by staying relatively sedentary for a little while after eating. Don’t work against your body, work with it. 

  Come home from work, eat a small snack if you need to so you feel satisfied, and then go do something physical. Once you are finished with that, make yourself a nice dinner, sit down and enjoy it, and then kick back for the rest of the evening.

  There are plenty of other feel-good activities we can do to help combat stress. Things like getting a massage, taking a bubble bath, lying on a beach with our toes in the sand. Yes, these are great me-time luxury activities that can help. But I want you to think about stress as something to manage in your daily life, without costing a fortune or requiring you to travel far. And now that you understand the physiological causes and effects of stress, you can do this much more effectively.

  Keep in mind that if you have a health disorder that stress exacerbates, please don’t hesitate to visit your doctor. It may be a much more complicated matter than just being stress-induced, so it’s important to get to the root of what is going on and understand your body. 

  Now you have a deeper understanding of what it means when we say, “I’m under a lot of stress” and even better, you have some tools as to how to manage stress better. I hope you can take what you’ve learned and apply it to your life, you can do it as soon as today. So don’t wait. Take steps towards a happier and healthier life right now. You deserve it.

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  The long awaited honeymoon! It's been a journey to get here. When we set our wedding date for October 8th we knew we would not be able to take a honeymoon right away. Not only is my husband a teacher, but this was his first year in a new district. Trying to take a week off at the beginning of the school year would not have been a good idea. So we made plans to take this honeymoon this summer. 
  Even before we got engaged we'd talked about doing something extravagant for a honeymoon and Paris had always been the original plan. Then, after the wedding, our focus shifted. We put honeymoon plans on the back burner because we decided to start house hunting. When that didn't work, we rekindled our vacation plans but this time were trying to keep it more low-key by going to Banff and Jasper National Parks in Alberta. (FYI- it takes almost as long and costs almost as much to fly to Calgary as it does Paris). 
  The day before the Alberta trip, the plans came crashing down. Due to flight changes, inclement weather, and website malfunctions, we hit road block after road block in trying to make the trip work. Finally, around midnight we had to admit defeat. That trip was not going to happen.
  We woke up the next day very upset, but immediately picked up the pieces and decided to plan a completely new trip. After checking various flights and accommodations we chose a brand new destination- we were going to Paris like we'd originally planned!
  The Universe was looking out for us, because we just knew this was the trip we were supposed to take.
 
  Normally I keep my blog posts on here business related, but we had such a great time I can't help but want to blog about the whole trip, so that's what I'm going to do! Plus it might help someone in the future if they are ever traveling and happen to come across it. I felt like many of the travel blogs and guidebooks I read let me down a bit on this trip, so I'm going to include some tips from what we learned. 

  Day 1 - We got in at 2pmish on August 16th. We'd been awake for almost 24 hours at that point but knew we'd need to push it a few more so we didn't end up jet-lagged. 
  We stayed in an AirBnb in the 16th District in an area called Auteuil. The apartment was SO cute, very Parisian. the 16th is a quieter, slightly affluent area, though still not far away from the center of the city. We could have walked to the Eiffel Tower in about 35 minutes if we'd wanted to. But the best part was that the apartment was only about a 3 minute walk to the nearest Metro station. We really ended up in an amazing location.       

  Day 3 - We decided to check out The Louvre knowing we may not actually get inside, which we did not. Again, if we'd wanted to wait about 2 hours we could have but there were way too many other things to see and do to justify waiting. Also, this day was HOT! Very very hot and humid. So while we were able to awe at the iconic Pyramid and the architecture of the palace, we chose to move on from the museum and instead go visit Notre-Dame Cathedral. 
  This was one of my highlights! That cathedral is so beautiful. We were not able to go inside, as it is still under construction. But around the outside, they've created an amazing exhibit detailing the reconstruction efforts with photographs and quotes. It is so nice for them to recognize the powerful effect this building has on people, and allow them to get as close to it as they can, even if they can't go inside yet.
  We then walked across the bridge to a famous bookstore called Shakespeare and Company. Here I'd hoped to find the book I wanted as my souvenir, and I was in luck! I bought a cookbook called Et Voila! by Manon LaGreve. I've already made a few things from it, this was a perfect souvenir. 
  That night we had dinner at a bistro called Astier, a recommendation from a friend. Here we started to notice some of the nuances of French cooking. Particularly, how they don't do much in the way of seasoning to whatever the "start" of the show is. For example, if you order a steak it will be a high quality cut and cooked to perfection, but won't have been heavily seasoned. Instead, they will serve it with a sauce or side that is more flavorful and complimentary. 
  I should also mention here - there is very little A/C used in Paris, probably most of France. Some days that was fine, but on a day as hot and humid as this one was, it was difficult to fully enjoy our food while we were melting.  ​

Day 4 - The night before we had talked about going to Versailles. But for some reason, the idea wasn't sitting right with us. We knew the gardens were usually open even if you couldn't go inside the palace, but there were some differences on days that had special events so we weren't entirely sure if we'd be able to get in to anything without waiting for hours. Considering it was Saturday and probably super busy, we decided to stay in Paris. 
  We explored the super artsy and bohemian neighborhood of Montmartre. Even with throngs of people you can see why this would be an artist's haven. There's a charm here that is different from other areas of the city, and it's fun to walk around the cute cobblestone streets and watch artists paint their works.  

  Dinner that night was a River Cruise with Bateaux Parisien. While the food was good, and it was fun cruising along all the famous sites, we would probably not do this again. It was the most expensive meal we had, but certainly not the best. Plus, with a 6:15 start time, the sun was in our eyes the whole time. 
  We were going to stay in the city center and wait until the lights on the Tower came on, but after dinner we would have had almost 2 hours to kill until that happened, and we quickly realized that Saturday night is not a time you want to be near the Eiffel Tower. The beautiful, calm, serene vibe from Thursday morning has been changed into absolute chaos with swarms of people around from base of the tower over to Trocadero. Think Times Square times 100. Tip: Avoid the touristy areas on weekends!!!!

Day 5 - Our last full day. After being traumatized by the amount of people downtown the previous night, we decided to spend our last day exploring the 16th District, the area where we were staying. This ended up being one of the best day (although all the days were great). 
  I came across an amazing find that I had not seen in any guidebook- we were in walking distance of a museum called the Marmottan, which has a huge collection of Monet paintings. And guess who my favorite painter is? That's right. 
  We had a great time there (and it was the only building we'd been in for days that had air conditioning!). Even my husband, who isn't a huge art fan, is always moved by impressionism. He is a classically trained musician, and this era of art he can easily relate to the movement going on in music at that same time.  Seeing these works was inspiring. 
  For dinner, we chose a newer restaurant called Mon Square. Near Invalides, so a little farther in that the crowds reached, this was a nice place to experience a more modern Paris that caters to a slightly younger crowd. It was very colorful and "grammable" inside, and the staff was extremely friendly and accommodating. 
   We noticed that because there are so many cafes and restaurants to chose from, not one place we went to was packed. This helps with being able to take your time and enjoy your food. You never feel like they are trying to rush you out the door. One other thing the guidebooks/blogs let me down on- I'd read that tipping was not customary because most restaurants automatically include a 15% gratuity in the bill. However, not one place we went included any kind of upcharge and it is not prompted when they charge your card. This meant, since we did not have cash, we really didn't end up tipping much. I feel guilty, and hope that is really isn't as customary as it is here, but in the future I will definitely take out some euros to leave on the table for a server just in case. 

With our last full day coming to a close I admitted that the one thing I would be sad to have not done was see the Eiffel Tower all lit up at night. We were unsure whether we should try to brave the crowds, but after a few drinks we decided to go for it.
  We ended up taking the metro from Invalides down to Champs du Mars, and by the time we got there it was already lit up in all it's glory! If you want to avoid crowds, we learned to stay at the far end of Champs du Mars. The vibe down there was similar to our first experience. Yes, a lot of people, but fairly quiet and chill. If you want to see the lights at night, this is the station and area to stick to. 
  I am so happy we made an effort to see the lights, it's just another amazing way of seeing this iconic landmark.

  Day 6 - We had to check out of the AirBnb by 11 but our flight wasn't until pm. Luckily, Paris has plenty of places near busy hubs where you can store luggage. We chose a City Locker near Gare du Nord. This was a great thing to be able to do. You just reserve a locker ( we needed 2) for $15 each, you get emailed a code to get into the building and codes for your specific locker. It's really convenient and helped us be able to enjoy our last few hours in the city without carrying around 3 suitcases. 
  Our last stop was the Luxembourg Gardens. This was a nice place to relax and unwind after several magical but tiring days. There are plenty of tourists there, but quiet and respectful ones, as well as a lot of locals out for a picnic lunch. The Medici Fountain is a very romantic spot. 
  We got gelato from a place called Amarino's and it had the best chocolate hazelnut gelato you could ever imagine. That was our last taste in Paris and it did not disappoint.  

  We had such an amazing time and cannot wait to go back. Paris, for all it's luxury, is also a very accessible city. You can easily navigate the Metro and get anywhere you want for little cost. It is helpful to speak some French, like my husband does, but English will still get you everything you need. There are busy touristy spots, but also areas for respite from the crowds. And it can fit almost any budget, we found the prices for things were comparable to what they'd be in New York as far as food and drinks. 

  However, we will never go in August again! A cooler time of year would not only be better, but August us peak tourist season. And many locals leave for August so several shops and cafes were not open. A spring or fall trip would be amazing!

  It was very much worth the stress of losing the original trip as well as the time it took to get to this point. As a little girl, you dream of honeymooning in Paris with your Prince Charming. My dream became reality! 

  Infertility- it's a confusing, frustrating, and heartbreaking condition. And even though it's something experienced by millions of people, that fact doesn't make one going through it feel any less alone. 
  There are many possible causes, and often the root of the problem involves several different factors. Diet, lifestyle, medications, pre-existing conditions, any or all of these can have an effect on your ability to conceive. 
  By the time I see women for fertility massage, they have usually been through it all- tests, procedures, surgeries, medications, you name it. Sometimes they have answers as to why they have been unable to conceive, but it is not uncommon for no known reason to have been discovered. 
  It is also common for first-time patients to have already been through several fertility treatments- anything from hormonal medications to IVF. If they have tried these treatments but are in for an appointment with me, it means that the treatments failed, and they have experienced the painful loss of what could have been. 
  I start this post by acknowledging this struggle because I believe that to ensure my patients the best results, I need to understand their struggle. It is important for any healthcare provider to listen to their patient and empathize, but especially so when the patient is in such a vulnerable state and has been through so many highs and lows. 
  When you come in for your fertility massage, the first thing I will do is spend a long time taking an in-depth health history. This is not a chart you are going to fill out. It's more of a discussion about yourself and your fertility journey so far. I will ask you A LOT of questions, some may even have you scratching your head, wondering why I'd need to know that- but they are all designed for me to build a good picture of your overall health. This consultation will take about 15 to 20 minutes. 
  They next part of your session is the actual massage. I will leave you to undress and get comfortable on the massage table where you will lay face up throughout the whole session. Along with the usual sheets and blankets, I will also provide you with a soft towel to place over your chest so you will feel comfortable and secure throughout the session once I undrape you. For the first few minutes of the massage, I will place a warm castor oil pack on your lower abdomen. I won't get in to the specifics here, but castor oil has long been used to help many abdominal related health issues, including infertilty. If interested, you can learn more about the science of castor oil here. 
  While the warmth of the castor oil pack relaxes and soothes your abdomen, I will massage your neck and shoulders. This does not have a direct effect on fertility, but it feels good and helps us ease in to the session, rather than going right for the belly.  After 5 to 10 minutes, I will undrape your abdominals (this is why I provide the towel for your chest) and remove the warm pack. For the next 15 to 20 minutes I will perform various massage techniques on your abdominal and pelvic region. Your pelvis will never be exposed, it will remain draped with a sheet and blanket the entire session. The lowest point on your body I will touch is right over your ovaries, and during this part of the session, I will be massaging over the sheet. We will end the session with a few minutes of reflexology on both feet, where I will target specific acupressure points known to have an effect on the reproductive and endocrine systems.
  After the massage, we will spend the last part of your session going over your "homework". You see, when you come in for a session, I'll be able to use my expertise to determine what needs focus and how to treat various areas, but to get the most out of fertility massage, you need frequent sessions- frequent enough that it would cost a small fortune if you came in to my office for every single one! Therefore, during your sessions will teach you the skills you need to perform fertility massage on yourself! We will go over everything you need to know, I will have information to give you so you don't forget any steps, and we will discuss when I want to see you next and how often you need in-office treatment versus at-home treatment. 
  Truthfully, I hope you DON'T need many in-office visits- because that will mean we were successful!
  Now you know what a fertility massage session is like, but you might still be asking yourself- how does it work? Why would massage help me conceive? What does it do to my body?
    I'm glad you asked. 
  The biggest reason why fertility massage can be effective is because it is holistic- meaning the massage improves overall health throughout your whole body- not just reproductive health!
​  By massaging the abdominals and pelvis, we will free up restricted tissue around several digestive and reproductive organs. These restrictions can be caused by a sedentary lifestyle, sitting at a desk all day, or even overworking the abdominals (yes, you CAN exercise too much!). Massage will also increase circulation to the area as well as reduce inflammation. This does have a direct effect on your reproductive organs- such as freeing blockages in the fallopian tubes- but it will also improve your digestion and liver function.
  Massage also has a powerful effect on your endocrine system and helps to improve hormonal balance, something that is so important not only for increasing chances of conception, but for ensuring a healthy pregnancy, healthy baby, and healthy mom. By decreasing the stress response, we can help your body's over-taxed endocrine system so it can begin to function properly. 
  I do want every fertility patient of mine to keep something in mind- fertility massage is not meant to be a lone tool. It could be the deciding factor, the one thing missing from your healthcare routine, but on it's own fertility massage is unlikely to be effective. Remember- fertility massage is about improving overall health, and that's where your fertility journey should take you- down a road that leads to overall health. This means you should also be consulting with many healthcare providers including your doctor, your nutritionist, your endocrinologist, your chiropractor, your acupuncturist, even your yoga teacher! Put together a team of experts who work for you with the goal of improving your overall health. Although I want to be part of your team, I should not be the ONLY one on your team. 

  Ready to book? You can schedule your Initial Fertility Massage with me at Integrative Massage Associates of Albany by visiting the website here. Fertility massage is most effective during specific phases of your cycle, so once you book I will reach out to ensure the dates work for you. (Hint: Try to schedule your first visit right after your menstrual cycle ends). 

I am honored to help you on your journey toward conception and motherhood.